Wednesday, February 3, 2010
"What is In Love? What is Falling In Love?" Questions like these are the kind of questions that I asked myself a lot of times since God knows when. When i ask those who "had experience", most of them will say some thing like these:
1) Will miss him/her a lot(daily)
2) Will want to spend a lot of time with him/her
3) Will do a lot of things to make him/her happy.
If these are the definitions of Love, there was once a person that im willing to do all that for her. But, very unfortunate that back then I have to place studies in 1st place. Right now she is so far away from me and she gave her heart to some1 else. Once i was so crazy about her and waited for her to wake up outside of her house for hours. That's something that I might not do to some other girls any more. Im just so tired of this Love Game. Its too much competition to stay focus, too complex to be any fun. All I wanted to do is to be with her and Love her. Even if we do not speak a word or make a sound, to be with her and spend time together is all that i ask for. Knowing that she is safe and happy is such a great feeling.
Well the truth is it wasn't really that picture perfect, there are things that she do sometimes really irritates me. But think back about them makes me laugh some times. Not sure if she have much memories of me really. Cos it was really a 1 way traffic, I didn't really tell her that i like her also. But she is a very smart girl i must say, Im sure she knew it long ago edy. There are things that I did that was very obvious actually. I only wish that she liked me back then, but i doubt it. She is always the "high demand" girl, just like a magnet, a very attractive 1. At least I knew a few got attracted strongly, Im one of them ofcos.
Some times she's a bit dumb dumb lidat, (haha!) she's so cute and irritating at the same time. May be that is the reason why is she so attractive. Like a little girl, feel like protecting her from the world. Deep in me i know she don't need any protections, but she tend to open herself up and get hurt by her bf. May be its an effect carried forward by the previous relationship with another boy. Hope she doesn't hurt herself by her current bf anymore.
Why am i writing this? I'm not in desperation to get into a relationship. But it could be a good thing to have a girl to love and to be loved. I get a bit confused some times in the topic of Love. Hope I will find The One soon to spice up my life a bit. =)